Top 10 Blog Posts

4 Years of the BSG Blog


Top 10 Blog Posts on BSG.

I never thought I would write the phrase. I have been writing for this blog for 4 years now. I still some how think Smoke tricked me in to doing this, but nevertheless here we are four years later, and I am still splattering brain words across the internet. Even though this is called a top 10…I couldn’t really pick a way to narrow down a proper list, so this is more just a random list of 10 articles that I either enjoyed writing or got a grate reaction from in some way. So enjoy my list and some random thoughts about these articles.

10: World Records

The world records I am least likely to ever break is 1 of those ideas that I can’t believe I ever actually did. It started life as more of a joke on Twitter, but then it took on a life of its own.
These are some of my favorite articles to write because they are just dumb and fun, but I also think this came together pretty well so it makes it on to this list.

9: Tank Battle Review

Tank battle was my absolute favorite review I ever wrote. The game was terrible and a waste of 3 dollars. But the reaction to that review was fucking gold!
People have actually told me I shouldn’t write for a blog because of that review. I believe that every one is entitled to an opinion and if you don’t like my reviews that is fine, but if you like tank battle endless gunner you are wrong and you can see yourself out.
This is the only review that appears on this list. I thought about a few others but honestly it is mostly just the ones that got aggressive reactions of hate that were really considered. Plus maybe I can cheat and write a part 2 of this article that is top 10 reviews…probably not though.

8: The Pyramid Lie

This makes it on this list not because it was a fine article, or because it got any spectacular response. This is on the list for the simple reason that it is the stupidest article I wrote for the blog at any point. Some might argue the blanket article was worse, but I actually think this one was much more stupid. It was pointless and I spent way to much time on it. that is to say I wrote it and that is to much time.
This is why Smoke should probably have some level of standards for this blog. god dam it Smoke stop letting me write these dumb articles…but actually don’t!
It is also interesting to note that I published this article nearly on my 2 year anniversary of writing for this blog.

7: The things that shouldn’t be in games

The end of year countdowns are some of my favorite things to work on for the blog. I always love putting them together, and Usually I plan them out weeks in advance. The 2021 list will be no different.
Last year I dropped 4 lists and this was part 1 of my December countdown. The things that we don’t need in audio games is a pretty easy article to write. The thing is going back over it nearly a year later I still agree with everything I said. Developers please read this article before you start making a game.

6: A history of balls

This is an interesting inclusion on this list. It is the only article to appear that I had literally nothing to do with in any way.
Looking back I still find it strange that people were ever really confused. Communities develop little slang terms. Whether that be balls or any other random word or phrase. Yet when we come across ones we don’t use we feel confused and think it is weird.
So the amusing part of this for me is that even though I was very much confused by the balls thing at first…I really had no reason to be. Take any group that spends a lot of time together and they will come up with little things with in those groups. Then all you really need to do is remember balls!

5: Update Your Shit

Community service announcements have never been my thing. Although in saying that I do write allot of articles telling people how to do things…so actually that was a lie.
This was 1 of my favorites, and most ironic articles I have ever written.
First for those who don’t know. I lived in the past for a long time. My computer died in august 2015, and that computer was still running windows XP. On top of that 2 months later I got my first Iphone which replaced my barely functional but very stylish flip phone. Even better was a few months after I wrote this article I got called out because a bunch of programs I had on my computer weren’t updated.
The truth is I yelled about this allot but didn’t follow my own advice. But I do now so keep your shit up dated people.

4: Rules for Gamers

This article really does feel like screaming in to the void. While I stand by every one of these rules. and can’t stress how important they are. It is incredible to me that some how these are still just being ignored.
The grate irony is the first rule is about reading the read me. Chances are if you aren’t doing that you aren’t reading these blog posts. So it is a circle of pointlessness, But whether these rules have been useful to anyone the truth is it doesn’t actually matter. You have the rules either follow them or don’t.
However it has occurred to me that if you are reading this blog and wanting to better yourself another article pairs quite nicely with this one.

4.5: How to not suck at gaming

This is a perfect fit to go with rule 4. I actually had both of these articles selected and was going to put just 1 on the list. In the end I figured I would cheat and throw in a 4.5 rule.
Simply put This is a guide on not living your life as a basic bitch in gaming. Some one did put it to me that this was a way to go from casual gamer to hardcore gamer, but casual gamers aren’t all bad so I will stick with telling you not to fucking suck!
Also fun fact here. This article was originally written many months before it got posted, but I put it in my completed articles folder and forgot to actually put it up, So it nearly never happened.

Top 3

So these final 3 entries are with out question my favorite articles on the Blog. I wrote 2 of them and the third has well taken on a life of its own. I even have some bonus content to mix things up with the final post.
So with out any more word blocking here is my pick for the best 3 posts on the BSG Blog.

3: How to fix any Broken Electronics

I think I might have peaked with this article. It is with out question my finest work. It still brings a smile to my face reading this over 3 years after I originally wrote it.
The funny thing is I can’t even remember what got me to write this in the first place. Especially with early articles that are like this, Some event would have happened to make me think of the idea, but this seems to have come out of fucking no where. I also seemed to have used the word cunt far more frequently back in the day.
This is some of my finest work and probably should have got the top spot, but it was just barely beaten out by a couple of other articles.

2: The 5 Worst Things About audio Gamers

Well as this is an anniversary post how could I not include the very first article I ever wrote on BSG, The 5 worst things about audio gamers. It is still true, and it has spawned allot of different versions. Not only was this where it all began for me with writing blog posts. I think you can see a massive improvement in my blogging ability by looking at this post compared to much more modern posts.
But this article also has several other posts related to it which I will quickly list in case you have read this but not the others.
Mason Armstrong wrote his own version of this article but from the perspective of a developer. I actually really liked this concept. The worst thing from a gamer and from a developers perspective.

Developers Addition.

Weirdly I thought that I did a remake of this article for the 1 year anniversary but it turns out it was just randomly posted in May 2019. But I did remake this article with headings and everything.
Remake, 2019 addition.

For reasons I can’t begin to understand I apparently reposted it again but with the word the replaced with taco. I think I might have to take back calling the pyramid like the stupidest thing I have posted on BSG.
Taco Addition.

1: Why do Blind People Think They Can Sing

Well of course this fucking article by Smoke is in at number 1. 1 of the most liked posts ever to go up on BSG it is a glorious look at the fact so many Blind people think they can sing but can’t.
Not only was this funny, but he also convinced me with literally no effort to record a cover for a demonstration of terrible singing.
I still can’t believe I did this. What is worse is that it isn’t the only cover I recorded for the blog. Later on I recorded a cover of its reigning men.
When BSG started a Patreon we even included a tear at 50 dollars to make me sing you a song of your choosing. Thankfully at the time of writing this no one has ever wasted 50 bucks on this. If you have ever thought, I would love to make Hannibal ruin a song, and I don’t really need this 50 dollars, You could make that a reality.
This was a fun cover to record since I didn’t have to worry about it, And the amount of times over the last 4 years this article has been linked to people justifies my terrible life choices.
Smoke wrote this, but my involvement made this allot of fun, and I am glad people enjoyed my fine Nickleback impression.

Final thoughts and Bonus

I can’t believe how many blog posts are interwoven with other posts. I have had allot of fun over these past 4 years writing these funn, stupid, and just weird articles. I hope to continue to do just that, but I decided that putting the singing post at number 1 wasn’t bad enough so I have a bonus for you all.
As mentioned above, I recorded a version of Its Raining men in my Best Worst Cover ever blog post. The published cover in that post is a shitty cover, but a much worse unreleased version exists. I originally recorded it, but it was so bad I decided I should redo it.
Now while I don’t think this version should ever see the light of day Smoke disagrees and has been telling me to release it. I never planned to, but I got drunk and decided fuck it I will. So here is the original and much worse version of Its Raining Men.

Listen to Its Raining Men Original Edit


Did I miss any of your favorite posts. Let me know below.

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One Reply to “Top 10 Blog Posts”

  1. Still one of my favorite things you’ve ever written.
    “Finally the gravity charging system is probably the most effective way to bring function to your device.
    A good solid toss out an open window preferably from a grate height will turn your broken device in to a fully functional if a little scratch paper weight.”

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