Try not to suck to much!


How to not be a nube.

We have all been the new player in a game. In fact the first time we play a game we are a nube. But some people struggle with being a nube for much longer then others. So here is my guide on how to be a nubie for the shortest period of time possible.

Getting Started

Read the fucking read me!
I can not stress this enough. If you are new to a game. If a read me was included. Read the shit out of that.
I say this as some one who has been on both sides of the coin. Diving in to a game with out reading. and having to deal with people that haven’t read it.
But Hannibal what if its long, I can’t remember all that.
Hey guess what. No body can! At least few people can. But you might find the answers to some of those questions that you are just about to ask on the main channel. So skip looking like a dick and just read the help provided.
But what if the read me is out dated?
Well that is a very good point. If nothing else their is likely a list of important keys in even an out dated read me. So while I understand needed to ask some questions. Just remember that you might have the answers in that out dated documentation.

Stupid questions often breed stupid answers

Why Can’t I find anything while my head is up my ass.
I can’t tell you how many times I have contemplated murder on the grounds of some fuck whit sitting in a safe zone talking about not being able to find an item.
First its much harder to find that item while your not actually fucking looking! While we are on the subject. if you looked for 5 minutes on a map wear lots of shit spawns, and its random when that item your looking for spawns. keep looking!

Asking for Help

Ok it is time to walk on the blade of a knife. Because this is something you both should do if needed, But should avoid doing if possible.
Honestly when it comes to this I think my simplest argument is the best.
You will never get better at a game if you don’t try. Yes some games are hard and you might need help early on. But the more often you take the easy way out. the harder it becomes to learn for yourself. so you will keep sucking at the game for longer.
Remember this as well. If you are looking around at players who have half your level and who can do things that you can’t. Don’t just stop and think oh they have been around longer. Look at what they are doing and see if you can learn as well.

A point for douche bags!

Yes having 0 deaths or a really high kill streak or a sick stock pile of weapons cause you don’t die or don’t use them much, can be fun and give you some bragging rights.
But that does not make you a better player then every one fucking else! When I look at a game like Swamp and see players with 30 deaths I don’t think shit player. I think wow that player had a hard time starting out. But has put the work in to make him or herself better.
Yeah you might have friends to help you level up. You might have started playing during an easier part of the game. So you might be a high level with no deaths. But you might also suck really hard at actually playing the game!
So what is the point of this section. Experience can mean more in gaming then levels, equipment or points. Not just in 1 game either. If you take the time to learn things and get better. You might find some of the skills you learnt are similar to that of the next game you play. Then you will find you pick that game up just a little bit faster.


Honestly really if you take anything away from this I hope it is this. Take a few minutes out of your time to learn what you can on your own. You might just find that if you are a nice collected player that people are more likely to help you when you really need it.

A note from Hannibal

So off topic a little to finish up here. This article was actually written a couple of months back but just never got posted.
Honestly I post here every Friday but some weeks it is hard for me to come up with topic ideas. I am sure I can keep doing it but. If any one out there has a topic or topics they would like me to write about, Hit me up either in the comment section or on twitter and let me know. I will write about pretty much anything and feel free to take that as a challenge.

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